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segunda-feira, 29 de junho de 2009

De vez em quando acontecem umas catástrofes que te deixam surpreendido, puto ou até mesmo cagado. Momento em que se deve levantar a cabeça, estufar o peito e falar com convicção:
"AGORA FODEU!".



No entanto, muitos desses desastres poderíam com toda certeza ser evitados e graças à preguiça, memória fraca ou até mesmo a correria da rotina do século 21 (ou XXI pra não falarem que num conheço A.R.) a gente acaba esquecendo de providenciar os fatores que impedem a surpresa, o emputecimento ou a cagada nas calças.
Por exemplo, nesse final de semana passei por duas das experiências mais desagradáveis que alguêm pode vivenciar.
O final de semana começou bem, com os coroas indo viajar e a casa toda pra mim, implorando por festa, e era o plano a princípio. Tava todo empolgado correndo pela casa arrumando a zona baderna bagunça que cultivei ao longo da semana. Eis que correndo com as caixas de som na mão até a sala... meu dedo mindinho do pé, num golpe de rebeldia e querendo descolar-se do corpo, se joga contra o pé do aparador no corredor. Mandei um "Put a keep are you!!!" que se propagou por toda a vizinhança. Isso parece clichê, mas esse é o tipo de coisa que poderia ser evitada mas a comodidade falou mais alto.
Com tudo pronto, aguardando a galerinha dumal, resolvo tomar um banho pra dar aquela relaxada depois das mancadas que o destino me deu durante o dia. Mas foi só ligar o chuveiro pra começar um barulho estranho acompanhado de uma fumaça branca estranha, FSCHHHHH! E tem coisa pior?

Tem! desliguei o chuveiro, corri pelado até a chave geral, desliguei e fui ver o estado do chuveiro chumbrega de 25 reais. Abri o maldito e confirmei o que eu mais temia...
resistência queimada, nada de resistência nova na mala de ferramentas, eu fedendo e a galera vindo ¬¬"
Casa de um banheiro só é uma mer**. Mas eu tenho uma vizinha simpática, e ela cedeu até o shampoo. Obrigado Aline :D

Pois bem, segue abaixo uma lista de empecilhos e suas respectivas soluções, lembrando que são apenas sugestões e que certas situações não podem ser evitadas e é onde se aplica a lei do "Senta e Chora".

  • Dedinho Rebelde - Situação desagradável na qual o dedo mínimo do pé resolve separar-se do resto do corpo, e se joga na direção de móveis ou o que mais tiver uma quina bem rígida. Para resolver esse tipo de problema, pode-se usar protetores de quinas existentes no mercado de silicone ou espuma E.V.A., não custa muito e mantém o seu dedo no pé.

  • Resistência Queimada - Problema muito comum em casas com um único banheiro e uso muito frequente do chuveiro. Pra resolver este problema eu gastei um pouco mais comprando um chuveiro com resistência blindada, gastei cerca de R$400,00 divididos em 5 parcelas, uma pra cada membro da família e esperamos nunca mais ter problemas com chuveiro, sem falar que este libera um jato maior de água com temperatura agradável, até no inverno. Mas se a grana tá curta você pode pelo menos comprar uma resistência e deixar guardada para emergências, pode salvar sua noite. Eu agarantiuuu

  • Torneira Vazando - Aquele tipo de situação que você só percebe de madrugada, no auge do sono. Ou então no fim do mês quando a conta de água chega. E torneiras vazam graças ao desgaste de uma pecinha magnífica chamada Anilha Vedante, ou simplesmente borrachinha frágil que quando pressionada pelo êmbolo contra o corpo da torneira, impede a passagem de água . Frágil porque vira e mexe ela se rompe e a água vai embora junto com o sono e a grana. Pra evitar maiores dores de cabeça, compre a tal borracinha (encontrada em qualquer supermercado) em quantidades razoáveis e estoque em alguma gaveta próxima à pia.

  • Manchas nas Roupas - Não use roupa branca, esta atrai manchas escuras e eternas. E ao comer/beber alguma coisa sentado, aproxime-se bem da mesa de forma que a sujeira no máximo respinge na roupa. Só.

  • Trancado pra fora de Casa - Se sua casa não tem aqueles segredinhos, do tipo deixar um galho perto do portão pra abrir pela grade, depois pelo vitrô da cozinha pra pular a janela e destrancar tudo. Deixe uma cópia da chave com um vizinho ou amigo de confiança, e é importante que seja de confiança mesmo, senão além das chaves você vai perder a TV, o Computador, a geladeira...

  • Gravidez Indesejada - Use preservativo champs ^.-

  • Papel Higiênico Zerado - No mínimo frustrante! terminar o "serviço" e se deparar só com o rolinho bege é de ferrar o dia de qualquer um. Por isso é indispensável armazenar alguns rolos de PH, e de preferência DENTRO do banheiro. De nada adianta ter um monte de rolos do lado de fora, não dá pra sair sujinho pra buscar, e tomar banho merdecado melecado é no mínimo nojento. Existem alguns Porta-PH que vão do Mais Brega ao mais Decorativo. Se preferir pode comprar um monte deles e amontoar do lado do vaso, eu faço isso e dá pra apoiar o braço enquanto manda aquele fax pro Lula :D

É isso melpolvo! Algumas coisas podem ser evitadas, as outras... deixa rolar champs ^.-
Minha criatividade anda escassa e qualquer sugestão de post será analisada com carinho (ui), envie para ridemim@gmail.com e até a próxima amigueenhos.

37 comentários:

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Ô, menino, não seria nada mau fazer um puxadim para outro banheiro, hein? Juntar umas moeditas pra garantir um apezinho novim, hein? Duplamente banheirado! :-) Beijos e boa sorte!!!

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Fernanda, obrigado pela visita...
o "moeditas" foi carinhoso, mas infelizmente, o mercado Imobiliário não é tão carinhoso assim =/
as coisas estão caras minha querida, muito caras =D

Ósculos e Amplexos.

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Цены закупочные оказались самые высокие в г. Челябинске.
Все цивилизовано грузчики загрузили [b]Паллеты[/b] ешё и лом поддонов купили, расчитались на месте наличными.
Про другие фирмы я узнавал либо Цены низкие, либо Бракуют много, да и денег от них не дождешься.

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Playing bingo needs more than luck or skills and techniques, contrary to what most believe. Bingo, just like any game of chance, comes with rules and regulations that players should observe. Being a player comes with responsibilities and etiquette.

Winning the Game

The moment you figured out you won, you must immediately yell BINGO, and it should be loud enough for the floor walker to hear. The pot money shall be given to the winner once their winning card is confirmed. Well, in winning or once you know you just won, the most important thing is that you shout the winning word BEFORE the time elapses. If the game proceeds and the next number is mentioned and you failed to shout "Bingo", your winning card is disqualified. Therefore, this is the rule you must know.

There may be cases when there are two winners, and in this case the pot money shall be divided equally among the winners. Supposing there are two winning cards, the two winners will share half the prize money.

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Bingo rules are basically the same no matter in which Online Bingo hall you play. But still it's good if you know these rules by heart. If it is your first try, then ask for handouts and inquire from pros regarding the game rules. Nonetheless, the ideal thing to do if you have questions is to ask the floor walker and not the person seated beside you. You should clarify things and doubts before the game starts because asking too many questions as the game proceeds could well distract you. This guideline also applies to those who are newcomers at casinos, those who play roulette for the first time.

Bingo halls demand an age limit of 18 years old. If you are below this age, you are prohibited to play. Some bingo houses ban alcohol inside, so players aren't supposed to take liquor nor drink it inside the venue. Smoking may also be restricted inside the venue, as there are designated smoking sections.

Take note that some Bingo houses don't allow food but some do, so it basically depends on the venue. Policies vary among different venues. For instance, some bingo halls allow reservation of cards, while others don't allow it. Some allow people to leave the venue in the middle of the game, others forbid it. But there are general policies observed in all bingo houses, such as disqualification of tampered bingo cards. There is no way you can get away with a tampered card because the walkers are adept at identifying authentic cards from tampered ones. You could be banned from a bingo establishment if proven liable of tampering a card. Hence, you should play honestly.

Interestingly, some venues offer special bingo games for kids although some halls don't allow players to have companions while playing. Suppose you bring kids with you, don't let them run around the venue and bother other gamers. They should behave well whilst you play and the game proceeds. Play quietly and don't recite the numbers you desperately want to come off because you'll be much of a disturbance if you do. Decorous playing is expectant of all players, even those who play roulette at casinos. Also, having a valid identification is important because you don't know you might win and need to present credentials.

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